Forget about balance or the six lies between you and success.Sep 14, 2023
I am sitting here at my desk, finishing up the last touches before publishing this post, while knowing tomorrow I will wake up knowing exactly what matters most to me this week and having decided on my top priority in the most important areas of my life.
Let me assure you, I haven’t always felt that good when I thought about the upcoming week on Sunday.
To be honest with you, I often felt completely overwhelmed and almost depleted, as I sensed I had set myself up for failure without wanting it.
I wanted to get things done and be super productive while still being able to have a life, but somehow, when the days of the week went by, I felt I lost track - of myself, what matters most, and how to get things done, so I felt like I had my life together.
I tried hard to somehow “survive” the week and still move the needle in my life and work life, but oftentimes at the expense of my sanity and the overall happiness I felt in my everyday life.
It reached the point that as soon as the smallest “landmine” went off and an unexpected event blew up my week, I was about to lose it and went off on a tangent many times (yep, not proud of it…).
Today, I have learned how to schedule and bullet-proof my planning in a way that may not be perfect but feels like a lifesaver to me.
I just told my husband how surprisingly relaxed I feel after a week with two birthdays, two birthday celebrations, a show jumping competition at the other end of the island, and a sleepover with four teenagers ( my older daughter) in our house while keeping my workout schedule and signing two new clients for coach certification training in am co-hosting in Germany this October (if you are interested in getting certified as a Life Coach in German, you can check out the training here.
And I am not telling you this to brag. This is to let you know this is possible for you, too.
You CAN start to become a time warrior rather than facing another week that feels like a wild rollercoaster of unpleasant surprises, leaving you waving the white flag before Monday's even done!
So let’s look into the six lies between you and winning your week - this is an extract of my “Bad-Assing Your Time” Method that I am using for myself and also share with my clients.
Everything matters equally.
No, it doesn’t. Not everything deserves your attention - you must choose wisely, being connected to your values and purpose in life & business to choose your ONE thing. If you act on things in the order they are happening to you over the day, you will be overwhelmed 100%. Because life starts happening to you instead of “for you.”
Think of the Pareto’s Principle:
Twenty percent of your effort delivers 80 percent of the outcome. In other words, things aren't equal in the world of success - a small, hyperfocused amount of work creates most of the results. The right input creates most of the output. Selected effort creates almost all of the rewards.
Multitasking is a lie.
It is an invitation to f*** up more than one thing at a time at once. Our brain isn’t structured to do more than one thing with 100% focus, which you will need to do your most effective and efficient work.
Discipline is not what you think it is.
The truth is we don’t need more discipline than we already have. We need to direct and manage it better.
To be successful doesn’t require you to be disciplined at all times. You need a sprint fueled by discipline just long enough for habit to kick in and take over.
Disciplining yourself means you are training yourself to act in a specific way.
When someone looks “disciplined,” what you really see is someone who trained a handful of habits into their life. You can become successful with less discipline than you think because success is about doing the right thing, not about doing everything.
The trick is to choose the right habit and bring just enough discipline to establish it.
So don’t try to be a disciplined person, but rather a person of powerful habits and use selected discipline to develop them. Build ONE habit at a time. No one has the discipline to master more than one powerful habit at a time. Give each habit enough time to become a new habit. Science says this takes 66 days on average.
You just need enough willpower.
Willpower, or the ability to delay gratification, is a huge factor in future success. When our mothers told us “all good things take time,” they were actually right.
Think of willpower like the bar of your cell phone.
Every morning, you are fully loaded. As the day goes on, every time you draw on it, you are using it up. Willpower is like a fast-twitch muscle that gets tired and needs rest.
It is incredibly powerful, but it has no endurance.
The more willpower you use over your day, the more you collapse into your default actions. Ask yourself, what are your “default settings?” There is willpower, and there is “won’t power.” Most people bring their most important tasks to their “won’t power” without ever realizing that’s why it’s so hard to follow through. Do what matters most each day first, when your willpower is strongest.
Forget about balance.
Forget about balance - time management and focus go hand in hand. You don’t need a balanced life to create a successful life. Purpose, meaning, and significance matter way more regarding happiness. Extraordinary results require focused attention and time. Time on one thing means time away from another. This makes balance impossible if you really want to strive.
To achieve extraordinary results, you must choose what matters most, your ONE thing, and give it all the time it demands. This requires the willingness to get extremely out of balance in relation to other work issues and even sometimes private ones.
In your personal life, awareness of your spirit and body is key.
Awareness of your friends and family and your personal needs cannot be sacrificed if you intend to “have a life,” so you can never forsake work or one for the other. Your personal life requires tight counterbalancing. Stay connected with all areas in your personal life that truly matter to yo
u. Avoid long periods in your personal life where you go out of balance. Go short. Instead, in your work life, get acquainted with the idea that extraordinary results may require you to be out of balance for long periods.
To address your priorities outside of work, be clear about your leveraged priority so you can get it done and move on with enjoying your personal life.
Your work life is
divided into what matters most and everything else.
Thinking big is bragging.
If courage isn’t the absence of fear but moving past it no matter what, then thinking big isn’t the absence of doubts but moving past them. Only living big will let you experience your true life & work potential.
Think big. Allow your mind to brag about what is possible for you. A good rule of thumb is doubling down on everything. You want to sign three new clients, double down to six. Ask yourself: What is the most important thing I can do which by doing it, signing six new clients, becomes doable and fun?
Don’t fear failure. You need to fail to succeed in your life and business. Mistakes are only existing in your head. If something was a failure or a mistake, it is up to what you make it mean. If you are always learning, you are failing your way to success. Don’t let small things cut your life down to size.
Allow yourself to think big, aim high, and act bold. And see how you can surprise yourself by stepping into your future self.
To wrap it up, I would love to know, which of these “lies” have held you hostage the longest time in your life?
For me, it was the willpower lie and that I thought I needed to balance my life.
After I let go of some of these toxic beliefs about a successful life and time management, my life burst into possibilities.
And I want that for you too.
I believe that we aren’t meant to torture ourselves to success. We must become smart at managing our time and selecting our top priority to then negotiate with ourselves and our time supply again and again to win the game of "there-is-never-enough-time" instead of going down the rabbit hole of unfinished tasks, never knowing what matters most to move the needle in our life and business.
I teach my clients to get extraordinary results. They need to narrow down their focus so they do the things that are connected to the O
NE thing they decided on as their priority today, tomorrow, or this week to move the needle in their business.
Working like this has brought me not only the freedom I needed mentally to create way more meaningful results but also helped me to get on top of the workload that made me feel depleted before Monday even passed by.
You do not need 40 hours to run a profitable business.
What you need is the ability to manage your time, your willpower, and your focus.
Planning your time is creating your future.
Nothing less than that.
Want to dive deeper into creating results in your business without overworking? Join my Sunday Love Letter to get your weekly infusion of Magnetic Marketing.
See you there, my friends.